PHOTO OF THE DAY
I heart this little guy!
* the story
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
POPPED CULTURE
Last Tuesday I was invited to the opening of a rather unique art show. It was a showcase of murals by LA Artist Kent Twitchell, that have been lost. The experience of standing next to a 70 ft. Steve McQueen is both humorous and humbling. Also lucky for me, Kent is super cool! He is a great artist role model and has a very grounded perspective on his work and what it means to be a "public" artist.
Read The Times review here.
the king of cool - Steve McQueen!
the muralist and his muse...his very BIG muse
it's paint by numbers
no, really. see?
the freeway lady
after being lost, work has started on the second version of her - in a new home
wee and the artist!
* LOOK Gallery @ LA Mart Design Center
thru Apr. 27, by appt. only
Monday, March 9, 2009
TEMPTING SPARKLES
S: I miss your cooking! Mexico sucks.
J: Sparky, when you are done chasing sharks, this is waiting for you!
that's croatian farmer food with lamb, bolognese and bbq beef (that's new!)
Sunday, March 8, 2009
MESSY JESSIE
This is a view of one of the myriad of reasons I have fallen off the face of the planet. 
This is what happens when an artist is commissioned to do a piece and they have no studio. Good Times!
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
FOREVER IN SYNTH
* If only this was piped out onto the streets of BH every time I went there walking...
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
MONEY = MATTRESS
This story/fraud comes on the heels of Madoff and his monstrous ponzi scheme. WTF? Why does this kind of greed exist? I wouldn't turn down a million dollars if it showed up unannounced on my doorstep, but it wouldn't make me wonder how to trick people into growing it to a billion.
I am transferring all my funds to the safest place I can think of. My mattress.
* c/o BusinessWeek
Monday, February 16, 2009
Thursday, February 12, 2009
APTLY NAMED
"Today, I took my friend to buy a pregancy test. She took it and it came out negative. I decided to re-pee on it to be funny...it turned to positive." -FML
"Today, my boss fired me via text message. I don't have a text messaging plan. I paid $0.25 to get fired." FML
"Today, I was tutoring kids at an elementary school. One kid messed up my hair. I said, "Why'd you do that??" He said, "I have lice, now you have lice too!" FML
*all from fmylife.com
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Monday, February 9, 2009
PROOF POSITIVE
Designer to Editor: Please proof read the attached copy. Thanks.
Editor to Designer: The line "The best part of You IN Me" should be "The best part of Me IS You". We don't work for Larry Flynt here.
Designer to Editor: Oh, tight. I mean right.
*gives a whole new twist to Valentine's Day!
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
THE FIRST 25
Late last week I was tagged on Facebook (by just about everyone - thanks). It was my duty to provide 25 random facts about myself. If you are my friend on Facebook then you already know that I barely use the thing. It serves to facilitate my love of spying on people from my present and past. Oh. I guess that brings us to number one.
1. I like to spy. Your medicine cabinet is my treasure chest. If you have a problem with that, don't let me pee at your house (rude) or don't invite me over (which I totally understand).
2. 23. The best number ever. In numerology it is The Royal Star of the Lion (very fortunate) and mathematically, it's the number of chaos. Awesome.
3. I love words. I have the soul of a writer, but not the patience.
4. Anything delivered to the office. Flowers. Lunch. Goldfish. I heart deliveries!
5. I hate people who are rude, fishy, cold or boring. Say something when I meet you!
6. I listen to pop music. I watch gossip girl. I am nearly 30.
7. At one point in my life I did not understand The Orange. Why eat an orange when there are clementines? Why drink orange juice when there is tangerine juice? I even disliked the color. I am over all that now and happily I LOVE orange and oranges and orange juice.
8. Movies are not a good first date idea with me.
9. I read like it is going out of style. I will read just about anything. But if I decide I don't like it, I'll never go back to it.
10. I love to grocery shop!
11. I have a slightly photographic memory.
12. If I ever have a dog, they are NOT allowed in the bed. Or kids for that matter.
13. Listening to the same song over and over is a habit.
14. What I did before the internet, I have no idea.
15. To play the cello again is a goal.
16. There is not a day that I don't remember that I had cancer.
17. My freshman year of college I got so drunk, I walked off a second story balcony and got stuck in a tree. It took 2 hours to get me out. The next morning when I walked into the cafeteria, everyone clapped.
18. I HATE tampon commercials. Seriously, somethings do not need to be advertised.
19. Since I started this job I daily wonder if it is alright to blog about the bathroom. I am all for the courtesy flush, but 4? If that is what it takes - take your ass home! You are sick! Get away from me!!
20. I once had a boyfriend who was afraid of the word thick. THICK!!
21. I am an aries, born in the year of the sheep. That's a lot of legs to master!
22. At one point in my life I had 9 grandparents.
23. Learning to be alone (as an adult) is the best/hardest thing I have had to do.
24. The whole time I have been compiling this list I have been listening to Snow Partol's Crack the Shutters. On repeat.
25. I WANT TO BE SET FOR LIFE.
Monday, February 2, 2009
QUALITY TIME
P is brilliant. I am not at all biased, though. The other day she said, "go away mommy, I'm using this bathroom!" She was rifling through the drawers, having circumvented the child proof latches. Such a foreshadowing of what's to come when she is a teenager. She spelled "G-O-O-D-Y-E-A-R" yesterday when she was standing by my tire. F'ing brilliant!
Indeed my friend! Congrats on your little monster, at your next dinner party I am teaching her the Monster Mash, watch out!!
MONKEY SEE, MONKEY DO
A story, in two parts.
Saturday night I had occasion to dine at Maestro's. It was an evening of classics. A late reservation, a dirty martini followed by shrimp cocktails and perfectly seared fillets paired with creamed spinach. A classic American dinner accompanied by a lovely '03 Chateauneuf du Pape. Our patio table kept us away from the crush of the crowded upstairs bar and invited plenty of people watching.
Enter the object of my desire. The Monkey Fur Coat. She passed by our table swathed in a cloud of black. The long monkey hairs danced in the breeze, like a Tim Burton ballet. I had to know, was that actually Monkey Fur?
At first she wouldn't tell me. I assured her I was not in the business of destroying works of art. Her face brightened and she nearly stumbled (in her high patent leather booties) before she slyly informed me, "It's vintage Monkey." I wanted to grab the hair and toss her out of that coat, right over the balcony.
Perhaps you have never seen a Monkey Fur Coat. You have not been besotted by it's sheen, or enchanted by its dark, delicate nature. If coats were people, she would be that slightly drunken French girl, softly singing in the back of a dark restaurant in the Marais, at a table alone. You would not be able to take your eyes off of her. All black hair and white skin, unfocused eyes, wistful melodies. Until she looks at you. Even before she does, you know it. You're in love with her.
Now, snap out of it! We're not in Paris after all. The poor girl in the coat was terrified to tell me what it was! We live in California where fur is taboo. It rarely gets cold enough to actually need fur. For years I have struggled with my closet of furs. They were passed on to me after several deaths and years of languishing in trunks and closets. Anything with a head or all its legs still attached were shipped directly to a Hollywood prop house. They were creepy.
But I kept the blonde mink bolero. And the short beaver cape. Over the years I have added to and swapped out fur pieces. In fact this Christmas I parted with the grey fox collar car coat that was a Valentine's present (a million years ago!). Sparkles loves it and it fits her better than it ever fit me. My one standing rule with fur is that it must be vintage. I reason that if it has been dead longer than I have been alive, it's fair game. Oh, the word play.
How can one love something so confused and cruel as fur? They say all things in love are fair. And this is love.
*ps anyone wanting to add a monkey fur coat to my closet, size small and hip length. thanks!
Friday, January 30, 2009
OMG - FCF IS BACK!
The Best Craig's List Post Ever!
We met on Craigslist so I am hoping that this post finds you. I know that it could quite possibly be the most humiliating first date that you have ever been on, but I am willing to look past that.
I thought we had chemistry sitting at McMenamins sharing that basket of Cajun Tots while drinking the Terminator Stout. I really felt like there was a connection there. I found you to be intelligent and witty and looked forward to further conversation with you.
At some point in life, everyone has gambled on a fart and lost. It just happened to be on a first date in the passenger seat of my car. Please don’t feel bad. The package I sent you with Pepto the next day and the note that said “First dates are always a crap shoot. Call me” was meant to be funny, not offensive.
I have gambled on a fart and lost on multiple occasions. The first time I did it was very memorable. It happened when I was five and sitting on my uncle's lap. I am lactose intolerant, but love cheese. I probably win 95% of the time, but I don't think anyone wins 100% of the time. That's why they call it "gambling". I'm the last person to judge you for crapping your pants. In fact, I am impressed by your boldness. The timing on the other hand, could have been a tad bit better...like when you're not sitting on a heated leather seat...
What I am trying to say is that if you want to go out again, I would be more than happy to take you someplace where we can get a meal that is high in fiber and less taxing on the digestive tract.
I await your call,
Tad
P.S. - If you shat yourself on purpose to end the evening early…Touché…
*a million thanks BuzzFeed!
Thursday, January 29, 2009
I'M HOME
After a mildly exhausting day at the office I arrived home and looked forward to an evening away from the world. Maybe some history channel. Definitely some internet playtime. I needed a good, inspirational soundtrack.
Crash! Thud! Fu*king damn whore bitch! Bump. Bump. Bump.
I set aside my mactop and ventured over to the front window. What on earth could all that racket be over? I peered gingerly between the blinds and nearly pissed myself laughing.
24 cans of Coors Light were independently rolling and exploding down the outside staircase.
Sometimes there is no better comedy than one's drunken neighbor loosing all his beer. Cheap beer. That's why you don't drink cheap beer, it has a mind of it's own and the means to do whatever it pleases. Which tonight was beers on parade.
xoxo, wee
Monday, January 26, 2009
Thursday, January 22, 2009
THE HOW AND WHY IS NOT IMPORTANT
My freshman year of college there was this guy. Todd. He played Lacrosse (kind of the hockey of grass - it's violent and uses sticks, boys love it.) Anyway, we had psych 101 together. During one early morning class Todd was seated behind me, Tara and CJ. Every so often my chair got bumped. But not in the funny or clever flirty way. In the super-effing-annoying-what-the-fuck-are-you-doing way. Finally I spun and hissed "What up Todd?" His response? "I lost my thong under your chair."
From there on out we had an expression for Todd, The guy who has 2 brain cells and one is chasing the other.
Somehow that was relevant to the story I wanted to tell about Family Cruises in the 1980's after I found this:
We were BIG cruisers in the 1980's. When you think about it, that is kind of the quintessential 80's vacation. A floating monstrosity of indulgence that houses a multitude of fashion disasters and heinous hair moments. Lucky for all of you the family photos are at my parents place, we have some doozies. Me at 7 sporting white leggins, an oversized sweatshirt of neon paint splatters and rhinestones. My grandmother had it custom made. Gads.
As a kid cruises are great! Your parents cannot lose you, you're on a boat. You're loose! You are free to wander into the casino and disrupt all manner of games, hang out with the ladies at the salon and leave for dinner looking like a streetwalker! You can stay up late and run in the halls and sneak into the adult revue show! Now add in a flaming dessert and it was my 7 year old heaven. Did I mention my murphy bed? Awesome.
The SS AZURE SEAS
das boat
the capt. (we have photos with this man)
On a random side note I have been listening to Joshua Radin tonight and what happened to this guy? The man who started a song with "What if you could wish me away?", but all the newish stuff from him, sounds like the cheesy, pop industry replicant of him. What gives bud?
*all that and no cruise story? 'fraid so.
*all that and no cruise story? 'fraid so.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
NOW THAT IS A FIRST LADY
Congratulations Michelle Obama, you embody the true spirit of The First Lady.
Monday, January 19, 2009
MONDAY STYLE EMAILS
Can I get copies of those family pages so I can draft that copy? Thanks much! Then let’s make voodoo dolls…
x - coco
*I love my office mates!
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